Stress free for the holidays
The Balancing Act
By Diane Lang
1. Remember what the holidays are really about - spending quality time with family, friends and loved ones. It’s about giving love and joy to others. Watch your expectations - make sure they are realistic. We try for perfection at the holidays and we tend to forget what the holidays are really about. Remind yourself that the holidays are about being close to your loved ones -- everything else come second.
2. Take care of you - during the busy holiday season we forget about ourselves. We worry so much about setting a nice table, buying and cooking the food, decorating the house, buying the presents, etc., we forget to take a time out and spend some quiet time alone. Make sure to put yourself on your priority list and put yourself high up on the list. If we aren’t feeling mentally, physically and emotional healthy, how we will be able to have a good holiday? The more time you put aside for you the healthier and happier you will feel this holiday season.
3. Seasonal disorder - this is just another issue that can affect people during this stressful time. If you know that the cold weather and shorter days affects you and causes you to have negative moods then do some preventive work. Talk to your doctor about options, seek counseling before the change of weather and holidays start, set up a support system to help when your feeling down, invest in light boxes and plan a vacation to a warm destination (this will give you something to look forward to).
4. Start early - before the holiday season is in full swing, start making your things to do lists, start your holiday shopping early -- this way when the holidays approach, you’re not scrambling for presents. Start early - buy wrapping paper, holidays cards, etc. Be preventive.
5. Ask for help. There is no reason why you have to do everything on your own. Delegate this holiday season. Ask each person who is coming to prepare a dish or a dessert. Make your holidays not about the cooking but more about the socializing. If everyone brings a dish this will make your shopping and cooking much easier. Don’t feel guilty about it. Each year have everyone make it a point to help each other so everyone can enjoy the holidays. This can also be a great way to clean up after the holidays. Delegate the clean up from the dishes to vacuuming the house. If everyone chips in, it won’t be so bad.
6. Be up front financially - tell family and friends what you can and can’t do early on. If you know this will be a tough financial holiday season then recommend other options such as: Buying for the kids only, a grab bag, the charity option - everyone gives to a charity (whatever they can afford) instead of a gift or learn from our children - homemade gifts!
7. Gratitude - this is the time of year that we should spend more time counting our blessings, remembering what we have instead of worrying about what we don’t. Instead of "Keeping up with the Jones", take a minute to appreciate the abundance of love, health family and friends. Teach your kids about abundance. They should know that the most important things in life are the things that make us the happiest: Good relationships with family and friends, a partner we can share our life with and a full schedule of social activities that involve lots of smiling and laughing.
8. Watch the signs - listen to your body. If you are noticing any of the following signs then it’s time to make changes:
- Change in sleeping habits
- Change in eating habits
- Feeling irritable, moody and unhappy
- Exhaustion and fatigue
- Panic attack symptoms like dizziness, heavy chest, heart racing, headache, feeling nauseous, hot and cold flashes
- Physical signs such as headaches, stomachaches, joint pain and low immune system - catching frequent colds and illnesses.
- These symptoms are all warning signs of too much stress and anxiety in our life. This is a sign to slow down and take a time out.
A therapist at the Universal Institute in Livingston, New Jersey, Diane Lang counsels patients with traumatic brain injury and substance abuse issues. Her clinical experience includes patients with different forms of mental illness, physical and emotional abuse, and marriage and relationship problems, among others.
Viewed as an expert in the world of balancing motherhood and career, Diane Lang’s first book Baby Steps: the Path from Motherhood to Career, was introduced last year. Baby Steps helps women sort through the thinking and second-guessing that accompanies returning to the workforce, and stresses striving for balance, health and happiness rather than “having it all.”
As a speaker, Lang presents her workshop “The Mom Series” in NY metro area locations, to assist mothers returning to work. Additionally, Lang is a regular contributor to working mother and parenthood blogs such as MomsontheMove.com and MommyTalk.com.
Alongside her work in the motherhood-career forum, Lang works as an Adjunct Professor in Psychology at Montclair State University and Centenary College. She also serves as co-host and guest expert on the Expat radio show, a global radio show for and about expatriates, discussing topics such as the stress of moving abroad.
Lang made her debut as a therapist for ourprisoner.com, a reality based Internet show, where she held weekly sessions with the “prisoner” dealing with identity, insecurity and emotional abuse issues. Her other on camera credits include Host for Generation X-tinct, Absolute Fitness and various educational videos.
A Mother to six year-old daughter Lauren, Lang’s academic credentials include an M.A. in Counseling and a B.A. in Liberal Arts from the New York Institute of Technology.
Diane can be reached at Lifeline36@aol.com.
View Dianes Profile on Butterfly by Clicking Here
By Diane Lang
| It’s the beginning of the Holiday season and with the holidays comes stress. Each year we feel a mix of joy and anxiety when we approach the days before Thanksgiving. The Holidays can bring stress starting in November and going straight thru till New Year’s. We feel a mix of stress related to financial costs of the holidays, family coming to stay and the conflicts it brings, the stress of trying to have the perfect meal and holiday.
If you’re one of those people who feel the holiday blues, here are a few tips to help you through the stress and anxiety of the holidays. |
1. Remember what the holidays are really about - spending quality time with family, friends and loved ones. It’s about giving love and joy to others. Watch your expectations - make sure they are realistic. We try for perfection at the holidays and we tend to forget what the holidays are really about. Remind yourself that the holidays are about being close to your loved ones -- everything else come second.
2. Take care of you - during the busy holiday season we forget about ourselves. We worry so much about setting a nice table, buying and cooking the food, decorating the house, buying the presents, etc., we forget to take a time out and spend some quiet time alone. Make sure to put yourself on your priority list and put yourself high up on the list. If we aren’t feeling mentally, physically and emotional healthy, how we will be able to have a good holiday? The more time you put aside for you the healthier and happier you will feel this holiday season.
3. Seasonal disorder - this is just another issue that can affect people during this stressful time. If you know that the cold weather and shorter days affects you and causes you to have negative moods then do some preventive work. Talk to your doctor about options, seek counseling before the change of weather and holidays start, set up a support system to help when your feeling down, invest in light boxes and plan a vacation to a warm destination (this will give you something to look forward to).
4. Start early - before the holiday season is in full swing, start making your things to do lists, start your holiday shopping early -- this way when the holidays approach, you’re not scrambling for presents. Start early - buy wrapping paper, holidays cards, etc. Be preventive.
5. Ask for help. There is no reason why you have to do everything on your own. Delegate this holiday season. Ask each person who is coming to prepare a dish or a dessert. Make your holidays not about the cooking but more about the socializing. If everyone brings a dish this will make your shopping and cooking much easier. Don’t feel guilty about it. Each year have everyone make it a point to help each other so everyone can enjoy the holidays. This can also be a great way to clean up after the holidays. Delegate the clean up from the dishes to vacuuming the house. If everyone chips in, it won’t be so bad.
6. Be up front financially - tell family and friends what you can and can’t do early on. If you know this will be a tough financial holiday season then recommend other options such as: Buying for the kids only, a grab bag, the charity option - everyone gives to a charity (whatever they can afford) instead of a gift or learn from our children - homemade gifts!
7. Gratitude - this is the time of year that we should spend more time counting our blessings, remembering what we have instead of worrying about what we don’t. Instead of "Keeping up with the Jones", take a minute to appreciate the abundance of love, health family and friends. Teach your kids about abundance. They should know that the most important things in life are the things that make us the happiest: Good relationships with family and friends, a partner we can share our life with and a full schedule of social activities that involve lots of smiling and laughing.
8. Watch the signs - listen to your body. If you are noticing any of the following signs then it’s time to make changes:
- Change in sleeping habits
- Change in eating habits
- Feeling irritable, moody and unhappy
- Exhaustion and fatigue
- Panic attack symptoms like dizziness, heavy chest, heart racing, headache, feeling nauseous, hot and cold flashes
- Physical signs such as headaches, stomachaches, joint pain and low immune system - catching frequent colds and illnesses.
- These symptoms are all warning signs of too much stress and anxiety in our life. This is a sign to slow down and take a time out.
A therapist at the Universal Institute in Livingston, New Jersey, Diane Lang counsels patients with traumatic brain injury and substance abuse issues. Her clinical experience includes patients with different forms of mental illness, physical and emotional abuse, and marriage and relationship problems, among others.
Viewed as an expert in the world of balancing motherhood and career, Diane Lang’s first book Baby Steps: the Path from Motherhood to Career, was introduced last year. Baby Steps helps women sort through the thinking and second-guessing that accompanies returning to the workforce, and stresses striving for balance, health and happiness rather than “having it all.”
As a speaker, Lang presents her workshop “The Mom Series” in NY metro area locations, to assist mothers returning to work. Additionally, Lang is a regular contributor to working mother and parenthood blogs such as MomsontheMove.com and MommyTalk.com.
Alongside her work in the motherhood-career forum, Lang works as an Adjunct Professor in Psychology at Montclair State University and Centenary College. She also serves as co-host and guest expert on the Expat radio show, a global radio show for and about expatriates, discussing topics such as the stress of moving abroad.
Lang made her debut as a therapist for ourprisoner.com, a reality based Internet show, where she held weekly sessions with the “prisoner” dealing with identity, insecurity and emotional abuse issues. Her other on camera credits include Host for Generation X-tinct, Absolute Fitness and various educational videos.
A Mother to six year-old daughter Lauren, Lang’s academic credentials include an M.A. in Counseling and a B.A. in Liberal Arts from the New York Institute of Technology.
Diane can be reached at Lifeline36@aol.com.
View Dianes Profile on Butterfly by Clicking Here
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